sweko
6/19/2016
The first chapter works great as a short story. Unfortunately it's all downhill from there.
A shady empire, a living castle, more princes and princesses that you can shake a stick at, multiple protagonists, and you have one giant mish-mash, where there aren't any characters you can love or hate.
It doesn't help that it appears that all the characters are dumber than a box of rocks, and that they exhibit any trait that is needed for the current page, and it's forgotten once the page is turned.